Woman Crush Month is a month-long series by the girls of She Did What She Wanted
in celebration of Women’s History Month.
By Anna Bailey
When you Google Amber Heard’s name, the first few links are about her new relationship with Elon Musk or her very public divorce from Johnny Depp. It’s about four links down, when you finally get to her newest role as Mera in Justice League, before you get to anything that’s actually about her and her career.
Amber Heard joined a (not so) shockingly long list of female celebrities who have come forward about their partner’s abuse only to be turned into the newest victim-shaming joke. As a victim of abuse, I’ve learned a lot from watching Amber Heard handle what’s been handed to her.
First lesson: you are not what happened to you. Amber has become an advocate for individuals in abusive relationships – she’s been vocal about how abuse isn’t just physical; it’s emotional, verbal and financial. She isn’t the Woman Who Was Abused by Johnny Depp; instead she’s the Actress Who Donated Her Alimony Money to Charity. We’re used to women being silent, whether or not their silence is a choice, in the face of their adversity. We’re used to women placating men and the media and our insufferable culture that allows men to succeed despite every awful thing they’ve done. But Amber wasn’t following suit – she was vocal and stood up for those who don’t have the voice or power to stand up for themselves. She wasn’t going to let this be the most interesting thing about her.
Second lesson: not every victim looks the same. Amber Heard is a beacon of light and honesty. She was constantly spreading positivity in every form – through her words, through her art – and working to erase the stigma on bisexuality. It’s difficult to imagine someone wanting to destroy the light. Something like this can happen to anyone, at any time, and Amber showed the world just that. Amber showed us that sometimes people’s only goal is to diminish the worth of others, and that’s never our fault.
Third lesson: life is too short to live with cruel people. No matter who the person is, no matter how much money they have or how much notoriety they have, they will never be worth the torture they’re putting you through. This lesson isn’t just for romantic love; it’s an evergreen lesson. It’s a lesson we should be taught at a very young age but never are. Instead, we’re asked to put friendships and lovers to the test and if it ends up poorly, then I guess we should’ve known better. Days after she filed for divorce, Amber was pictured smiling and laughing alongside friends. That’s how someone should act after a separation from cruelty; they should be joyous. They deserve to feel happy again. Amber deserved to be smiling, despite what the media headlines say.
Amber Heard isn’t my #WCM because of her movies, though Zombieland did change me as a person, but instead because of who she is as a person and what she represents. It’s my belief that Hollywood would be much dimmer without her light.
She Did What She Wanted firmly believes there’s nothing better than women empowering other women, so when we found out March is Women’s History Month, we knew we needed to do something special. There are too many amazing women to fit into just thirty one days, but to do our best, we invited our contributors to write about the favorite women in their lives, and Woman Crush Month came to be. #WCM is the ultimate girl power party, and it’s all about women celebrating women and their achievements, and we personally can’t think of anything better than that.